Filling up the box
After almost a month in Shanghai we are finally starting to get some traction and putting the pieces together to make our space a home. It’s been an effort and I can’t thank J or Kiddo enough for their patience and perseverance in doing this as a family. It’s not been easy. There have been a few meltdowns; from all of us. Nothing major, but J and I have had our moments of just having enough of enough. Kiddo, for her part, has had to do all the new stuff - new friends, new school, new house, new bed, new everything - and she’s been a trooper as well.
There’s still some building to be done before it’s done, but for the most part, it is done. There are little holes and things that need to be filled in, but we will get to that when we finally finalize where and how it all fits together. I’d hate to get a lamp or a rug or something like that and then decide we want the room to face this way instead of that and suddenly those little parts don’t fit any longer.
Pic will be coming, but give us another week or two as we figure it all out and get it to our liking. In our usual style, we went with some funky colors and patterns. It will be a colorful place and very much us. I can’t wait to get it all put together and in place so we can start to show it off… And use it all.
There have been hang ups and set backs, but that’s part of the adventure. We never expected it to run smooth as silk, but we didn’t expect the month of sandpaper we had to endure to get here. I can definitively say that if I don’t see the inside of an IKEA for another year, I’ll be a happy man.
The good news is that we adapted very easily to our place and the size. Asian living is a bit different. You find a way to fit the space, you don’t have the luxury of filling the space. It’s hard to explain to those that haven’t lived it, but we have the experience to know the difference. It’s very much efficiency living. You need to use all the space you have and anything that is waste needs to go. I say that and our space is bigger than our previous place in BKK. It’s just very different and having it empty was a bonus. Yes, it took us a month to figure it out and get what we needed, but we could conceptualize it a bit better this time and use the space a bit better. We also had the added bonus of not having odd corners and cabinets that were unmovable and built in. The things that are built in are closets and cabinets, but those are in the kitchen, bathroom, and off the front door. The rest of the space is ours to use and fill as we please.
So, as it comes together and we get it to our liking, we’ve been making it up and making it work as needed. For a while there, I was creating nightly meals (and lunches for Kiddo and myself until school started) with a wok and a noodle pot…. And the knives I brought with me (thankfully those are good quality) and a cutting board. Yes, we had a few plates and bowls, about 3 each of utensils, but that was about it. We made it work.
As its filled out and filled in, we talked about what would work and if it was a short term fill or an ACTUAL solution for us. If it wasn’t a solution, we didn’t get it. We were purposeful in how we did this and what we selected. That’s part of why there are still small holes to fill. We’ve got at least 2 years here and we’re thinking (even if it’s not SMIC) that we will stay in China for 4ish years. We can move easily enough with what we have, so again, select with purpose, not to just fill a gap for a year or two and then move on. If this is going to be home, we wanted to make it a home. Something that we ALL could use. A place that Kiddo could call home and treat as such. Even if it’s in a new space in 2 years, we want the sofa to be the sofa. We want the dishes to be the dishes. We want her things to feel homey and part of her life, not things that will be replaced every 2 years. We want to give her a sense of place. A sense of comfort in the things in her life.
She is, after all, the biggest reason we are on this adventure. To give her more. To show her more. To give her experiences that she’d never have had we stayed in America. After our few weeks there this summer, we (J and I) have spoken many times about how we’d never be able to make it work. Not only do we not enjoy the mindset, we wouldn’t be able to do any of the things that we enjoy doing. Between the two of us, we’d do nothing more than work and that would be break even. We’d not be able to explore new places. We’d not be able to take Kiddo cool places and give her cool experiences. We’d have probably needed to give up our SD Zoo membership, because it would have been cost prohibitive with the cost of living. We would have lost in staying…. Not just the zoo membership, but also the experiences and adventures that we’ve had while living the expat life.
It’s been a month of struggle. It’s been a month of living in a partially furnished box with no TV. All that is changing and we have the next two years to enjoy. Experience. Explore. On top of that, we’ve learned how to adapt. To endure. How to overcome challenges. We’ve learned some Thai and how to live in Thai culture and now we get to do the same in China and Shanghai. That’s pretty cool, you gotta admit!
Also, it’s pretty cool that Kiddo is learning to see beyond. Her friends are a mix of Korean, Thai, Indian, Chinese, and Western (UK, USA, and the like) and even in that mix of friends, about half are mixed on top of that (Korean/UK as an example) and that’s just a fact of life. She doesn’t gravitate towards the “staff kids” that are familiar and “the same” as her. She likes the difference and adds to it. Also, in speaking with the mother of her new friend H, the mom asked how “Kiddo got such an unusual name for a blonde American girl.” If you know Kiddo’s name, I’m sure you can see why her friends parents, upon meeting her, are expecting a little Japanese or Indian girl and here comes blonde hair and blue eyed Kiddo. She is an unusual kid (in name and how she acts) and I can’t help but think that this life and adventure are part of making her that person. Again, pretty cool!
Let’s go, Kiddo…. We’ve finally got the parts here and now we just need to get them put together and in place. Thanks for helping us pick it out and make it funky and keep it in our style. We’re super glad that you like funky like we do. We can’t wait to see what kind of funky you hold onto as you get older, in clothes, hair, style, friends, music, and all the rest. Next up, fun weekends and not shopping weekends of putting the house together. We love you and thanks for being our little partner in all of this.
Comments